I need for 2 essays I’ve submitted to be revised. Here’s my professor’s feedback on my submissions (attached):
“I am sorry that I don’t have better news, but I see that neither of the essays have the a thesis statement, supporting points, topic sentences, correct MLA citation, or correct formatting.
I want you to do well and to pass the course, so please continue to work on these essays. If you go to Purdue OWL, there is a video tutorial for how to correctly format your paper in MLA format, a sample paper, and a sample Works Cited.
I am including an outline here so that you can get a better understanding of how the essay about Native American influence in Colonial Literature should look:
Basic Essay Structure
INTRO: – Leading statements that orient the reader with the topic
This is where you would explain the time period and the background information about Native Americans. Any specific information from a source must be cited- even if it is rewritten into your own words.
– Supporting points (in the order they will be discussed)
This is where you would list the specific effects that Native Americans had on Colonial literature. Example (captivity stories, works of fiction that demonize natives, works of non-fiction that praise native efforts)
– Thesis statement (the argument of your paper)
This is your claim- or the point that you want to prove. Why are you discussing the effects that Native Americans had on literature? Example: Native Americans inspired Colonial authors to create new styles of writing that were different from the religious works of the Puritans.
Body- Write at least 1 full paragraph for each of the points listed in the intro. Be sure to include a topic sentence at the beginning that references the point being discussed.
The 1st body paragraph is where you discuss the 1st way that natives influenced literature (captivity stories). Then, include a specific quote or piece of evidence. Follow every quote or paraphrase with an explanation of its significance.
The 2nd body paragraph is where you discuss the second way that natives influenced literature (fictional accounts that demonized them). Then, include a specific quote or piece of evidence. Follow every quote or paraphrase with an explanation of its significance.
The 3rd body paragraph is where you discuss the 3rd way that natives influenced literature (positive non-fiction stories). Then, include a specific quote or piece of evidence. Follow every quote or paraphrase with an explanation of its significance.
Conclusion- So what? Explain why readers should care, or what they should take away from your paper. Include thoughtful,ending comments (like a closing argument to a jury).
This is where you go back over your main points BUT using different wording. Then, you explain what the “moral of the story” is. What is the lesson to be learned? What should readers take away from this paper?