Hi, You still have a lot of polishing and organization left to do:
- Explain the importance of this material, make sure each paragraph has a topic sentence that connects to your main argument. You are trying to explain which students of indian history need to learn more about the scholarly work on the Indus Valley culture, you don’t actually explain its importance. At times you just seem to be quoting or summarizing the work of other scholars that is not the same thing as an argument
- Put in Chicago style footnotes for each citation, I sent out a draft earlier, please make sure you know how to do this correctly.
- I have noted some changes for grammar and style, those are perhaps the easiest fix.
Please keep in mind that the quality of the argument matters as this will be 5% of the grade, and will be graded exactly the way papers for the class have been.
Please see more in the papers.